Bursting with Joy

Our first grandchild arrived last week, and our hearts are bursting with joy! This photograph is of our son holding his newborn daughter, Luna Bleue. 

Watching my child fall in love with his child… priceless. 

As a holistic health practitioner and doula, I’ve had the privilege of attending many births. It doesn’t matter how many times, or in what capacity I get to be part of the birth process, it never ceases to amaze me. 

When was the last time you fell in love?

© lauriebuchanan.com

The Eyes Have It

When we walk out our driveway and turn right on the sidewalk, we pass over a small stream. The other day we noticed an addition. Someone had affixed a pair of googly eyes to the rail.

I love to people watch. But I have to remember, it works in reverse, too. No matter where we go or what we do, a good portion of the time we’re being watched.

In my first book, Note to Self: A Seven-Step Path to Gratitude and Growth, I wrote, “Never underestimate the influence you have on others.” As a grandma-in-waiting (will September never get here?!) I’m aware that a little pair of eyes will be on me; my granddaughter will be in my sphere of influence.

Who do you influence?

© lauriebuchanan.com

Worn Spots

One of our daily walks includes the Baybrook Court Bridge that gets us from the north side of the Boise River to the south side, with ease. We never fail to stop, rest our foot on the railing, and take several minutes to appreciate the river as it meanders along, often carrying ducks and geese, and in the summer, rafts of people enjoying themselves.

You can tell from the worn spots in the paint that the bridge is well-loved. I hope that by the time I reach my expiration date I have lots of “worn spots” too. To me, it seems like a grand way of measuring one’s “loved-ness.”

“Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out, and you get loose in your joints and are very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real, you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.” —The Velveteen Rabbit, by Margery Williams

How do you measure love?

© lauriebuchanan.com

Let Me Call You Sweetheart

Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day. Doing online research, I found, “Though it’s recognized as a significant cultural and commercial celebration in many regions around the world, it’s not a public holiday in any country.” It went on to say, “In the United States it is a festival of romantic love and many people give cards, letters, flowers, or presents to their spouse or partner.”

The guy in the photo? That’s Len. He’s my sweetheart; the guy I’m still head over heels in love with after almost thirty-eight years of marriage. We’ve been through ups and downs, thick and thin, better and worse, sickness and health, joy and sorrow… many of the contrasts that relationships can experience, and we’re still going strong.

A few years ago I posted the ingredients for our long-term success. They bear repeating:

  • Self and mutual respect
  • Intentional kindness
  • Active listening
  • Forgiveness
  • Quality individual time, balanced with quality together time
  • Individual hobbies, balanced with mutual interests
  • Laughter. Definitely laughter!

What’s your favorite relationship ingredient?

© TuesdaysWithLaurie.com

A Heavy Load

For Note to Self book events, it’s important to find a commonality that levels the playing field and places all of us on the same page. That’s why I typically talk about non-forgiveness. It’s one of the heaviest loads (emotional baggage) we can carry or drag with us. I usually start by saying:

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Hint #4 — There’s no commuter train service in my sabbatical location.

Every single person in this room, without exception, will need to extend forgiveness to someone at some point in their life for something the other person did or failed to do. 

Likewise, every single person in this room, without exception, will need to receive forgiveness from someone at some point in our lives for something we did or failed to do.

Then I read a passage from Note to Self that begins on page 116. If you have a copy, you may want to check it out.

Has extending forgiveness, or the lack thereof, played a role in your health and wellness?

Reminder, the caveat of the Looking for Laurie game stipulates: “The first person to type the accurate city and state of my sabbatical location into the comments section of the Mar 28 post will receive a personalized copy of Note to Self: A Seven-Step Path to Gratitude and Growth for themselves or as a gift to someone else.”

© lauriebuchanan.com

Things I Want To Tell My Mom

The calendar indicates that the 25th anniversary of my mom’s death is approaching. So many changes have taken place in that span of time. Every day I think of things I want to tell my mom:

Four Generations: mom (left), maternal grandma (middle), me (right), my son (middle)

FOUR GENERATIONS: my mom (left), my maternal grandmother (middle), me (right), my son (middle)

  • I miss you. Deeply.
  • Not a day goes by that I don’t think about you.
  • I’ve written a book that’s coming out in November. I think you’d be tickled pink!
  • At 58, it’s hard for me to fathom that I’ve surpassed your lifespan by 5 years. I’m still galled that you died at the age of 53. I hate cancer!
  • I love you more than tongue can tell.
  • I’m a better person because of your example.
  • Thank you for instilling in me the love of reading.
  • And while I can’t possibly begin to know the anguish I put you through when I ran away from home at the age of 15, I want you to know that I’ve leveraged that experience and turned it into positives.
  • You were right, Len is a “keeper.” We celebrated our 36th wedding anniversary last month.
  • You’d have a blast with a cell phone—especially the FaceTime feature!
  • Your grandchildren have grown into wonderful adults.
  • Every now and then when I look in the mirror I see a glimpse of you in my features and I smile. I’m extremely proud that you’re my mom.

What would you like to tell your mom?

© lauriebuchanan.com

The Hugging Tree

In relocating last year we learned that Idaho is known as the “Gem State,” and Boise is known as the “City of Trees.”

Ideal for “tree huggers” (and dog lovers and bicycle enthusiasts), one of our recent walks revealed that it’s also perfect for hugging trees!

Hugging tree

In the years I’ve been observing trees, I’ve never seen anything quite like this. Notice how the left trunk seems to reach out and hug the trunk on the right.

Lifting you off your feet and whooshing the breath right out of you, it’s been noted on numerous occasions — by friends and family alike — that Len is a world class hugger.

Our son who’s coming for a visit in a few weeks has been put on notice: Be prepared to have the living daylights hugged out of you!

When was your last breath-whooshing hug?

© lauriebuchanan.com

We Eloped 34 Years Ago

The blue recipe box in the photo below contains worn and tattered handwritten recipes for some of our favorites: my mom’s baked beans (with pickle juice and bacon), my sister’s pretzel jello (perfect for bunco), my great aunt’s crustless quiche (breakfast, lunch, or dinner), and my friend’s peanut butter cookies (to die for)!

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Yesterday — St. Patrick’s Day — we celebrated our 34th wedding anniversary. People often ask us the recipe for our success. A few of our best-loved ingredients include:

  • Mutual respect
  • Intentional kindness
  • Active listening
  • Forgiveness
  • Quality individual time, balanced with quality together time
  • Individual hobbies, balanced with mutual interests
  • Laughter. Definitely laughter!

It’s been said:
Long-married couples look alike.
I don’t see any resemblance. Do you?

Photo on 12-25-11 at 1.00 PM

What’s your favorite relationship ingredient?

© TuesdaysWithLaurie.com

 

Wind Beneath Your Wings

It’s no secret that Len has a mistress—flying.

A private pilot, his heart accelerates when he hears the drone of an engine in the sky. We recently went to Brodhead, WI to attend the Pietenpol/Hatz Fly-In—a precursor to the famous annual EAA Fly-In that’s hosted in Oshkosh, WI.

1920 Travel Air bi-plane — click image to enlarge

After 33 years of marriage there’s still nothing that makes me happier than seeing his kid-in-a-candy-store, split-faced grin!

2012 Zodiac 601-CH — click on image to enlarge

How does a small plane achieve liftoff, let alone a ginormous commercial plane with all that weight: passengers, baggage, and fuel? Len can explain it—with enthusiasm—in a New York minute!

Hatz CB-1 — click on image to enlarge

I don’t understand the mechanics behind flying, but what I do know is that he makes my heart soar—he’s the wind beneath my wings.

Who or what is the wind beneath your wings?

Laurie Buchanan

Whatever you are not changing, you are  choosing.” — Laurie Buchanan

The Book — Discovering the Seven Selves
The Experience — Life Harmony

© 2013 Laurie Buchanan – All Rights Reserved

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