Category Archives: Personal Growth

Under, Over, Through

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I sit at my desk, perched in front of a window, for several hours each day. Whether it’s for online client sessions (via FaceTime or Skype), writing, or dipping into various social media pools, I have the perfect vantage of a many-hundred year old oak tree and its various occupants: squirrels, chipmunks, woodpecker, and one raccoon.

In multiple hours of viewing, I’ve never — ever! — observed them go around the tree.

Clearly evidenced by their tracks in the snow, you can see prints leading up to, and away from the tree, but not a single print around the base of the tree (click on the photo to enlarge).

Obstacle

When they arrive at this “obstacle,” rather than go around it (skirt the issue, ignore it, or sweep it under the carpet), they go under, over, or through it to get to the other side!

When you encounter an obstacle on life’s journey, how do you get to the other side?

— Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.” — Laurie Buchanan

The Book — Discovering the Seven Selves
The Experience — Life Harmony

© Laurie Buchanan 2014

Find me on Twitter @HolEssence
Find me on Facebook

OUTSTANDING or OUT STANDING In Your Field

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I’m fortunate in that I get to rub shoulders with some tremendously interesting people—people who are outstanding in their field because they consistently (1) show up, (2) put their best foot forward, and (3) apply themselves fully to their craft:

Sandi White — Master Gardener
Terrill Welch — Impressionist Painter
Debbie Jacob — Psychic
Sam Juliano — Teacher and Film Critic
Heather Shumaker — Author
Jeff Stroud — Photographer
Sibyl English — Vocalist
Kathy Smith — Film Director

And while this photo is of Len Buchanan out standing in a field, he’s outstanding in his field as well—technology.

Click on Photo to Enlarge

Are you outstanding in your field, or out standing in your field?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.” — Laurie Buchanan

The Book—Discovering the Seven Selves
The Experience—Life Harmony

© Laurie Buchanan 2013

Find me on Twitter @HolEssence
Find me on Facebook

Failure IS an Option

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Many of you know know that I’m part of a happiness study founded by neuroscientist Dr. Richard Davidson, at the Center for Investigating Healthy Minds at the Waisman Center, UW-Madison. The science of happiness shows that failure is an option. What matters is how we respond to it.

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Researchers found conclusively that we enjoy a higher quality of life when we experience a certain number of setbacks—5 to 7 of them. Why? Because setbacks give us confidence that we can weather adversity, and they also reinforce what we truly value—for example, health, loving relationships—which can result in enhanced priorities and different goals.

On the other hand:

  • Too many setbacks can result in breaking one’s spirit.
  • Too few setbacks can protect someone from developing resilience.

Resilient people tend to “make meaning” as difficult challenges are faced and overcome, which allows them to discover positive outcomes that wouldn’t have happened if the challenge hadn’t occurred. This is called BeneFinding—finding benefit in negative experiences.

What was the last benefit you found from a negative experience?

© TuesdaysWithLaurie.com

Sit Happens!

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Daily, I carve out time to sit like a bump on a log, or in my case, a meditation bench which I lovingly refer to as a “Buddha butt.” As a high energy, fast-paced, go get ‘em kind of person, sitting still doesn’t come easy for me.

The slight elevation of a meditation bench affords me the opportunity to stay in a seated position—spine upright—for an extended period of time. And because my rear-end isn’t resting right on top of my calves, ankles, or feet, my legs don’t go to sleep from cutoff circulation. I enter this still and quiet space with one objective — no expectations.

In my experience, the busier I am the more important the practice of stillness becomes. And the benefits of sitting quietly are tremendous:

  • Puts me smack dab in the middle of now
  • Cultivates internal quietness
  • Recharges my personal battery
  • Makes way for clarity and problem solving
  • Accesses my creative voice
  • Accentuates the positive
  • Diminishes energy that’s not serving me well

When was the last time you sat still?

© TuesdaysWithLaurie.com

Inner Alchemy

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I began photographing our yellow delicious apple tree in the spring, with the idea of capturing shots at various stages through harvest time. This, in an effort to visually convey transformation:

Alchemy is the process of transforming lead into gold.
Inner alchemy is my term for personal transformation to our highest best.

I believe that life is an expression of the choices we make, with each choice serving to transform us—subtle or obvious—body, mind, and/or spirit.

Further, I believe that whatever we are not changing, we are choosing. So much so, that my life’s purpose is based on this conviction.

The photos in this post were taken between April and September. This six-month window is the typical life cycle for apples in the United States.

Inner alchemy—personal transformation—occurs at different times and speeds for everyone:

  • Early, quick, and dynamic
  • Late, slow, and measured
  • Somewhere in-between

When it comes to personal transformation, are you an early or late bloomer?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.” — Laurie Buchanan

The Book—Discovering the Seven Selves
The Experience—Life Harmony

© Laurie Buchanan 2013

Find me on Twitter @HolEssence
Find me on Facebook

Mighty Oaks from Little Acorns Grow

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The squirrels in our neck of the woods are industriously gathering and hoarding acorns for winter. The empty holes in the precision-drilled oak trunks are tell-tale signs that the cheeky little fellows have additionally robbed the woodpeckers of their bounty.

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It’s no secret that great things often have small beginnings. What begin as acorns become mighty oaks, and I’ve learned a lot from observing the towering sentinels in our yard:

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  • Deep roots keep us grounded—know who I am, what I value, and why I’m here.
  • Teamwork and being able to stand alone are equally important.
  • Energy efficient, trees waste very little.
  • Stillness has many rewards—slow down.
  • Flexibility allows us to bend, not break, in stormy weather.
  • As trees close a cycle, they shed baggage to move forward into the next cycle.
  • Regardless of the weather, reach for the sky!

What have you learned from observing trees?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.” — Laurie Buchanan

The Book—Discovering the Seven Selves
The Experience—Life Harmony

© Laurie Buchanan 2013

Find me on Twitter @HolEssence
Find me on Facebook

Not just for Writers — Criticism versus Critique

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When I spoke at the Writers’ Institute at UW-Madison, one of my topics was why critiquing is necessary. My presentation included defining the difference between criticism and critique:

I represented CRITICISM with scissor blades facing the recipient — putting a person on the defensive. We typically react (knee-jerk) to this style of communication, viewing it as an attack. Criticism is problem-oriented, negative, and critical.

I represented CRITIQUE with scissor handles facing the recipient — putting the person at ease. We typically respond (thought-filled) to this style of communication, viewing it as a gift. Critique is solution-oriented, positive, and helpful.

When you provide feedback (at home, work, or in a writing situation), is your message respectful, honest, useful, clear, and specific?

© TuesdaysWithLaurie.com

Surfboards, Skateboards, and Vision Boards

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There are numerous types of boards—longboard, snowboard, keyboard, emery board, ironing board, diving board, cork board… But to my way of thinking, the most exciting is the vision board!

Unlimited in scope, a vision board can take you anywhere! From scorching sand-whipped desert plains, to pristine peaks on snowcapped mountains; from the pulsing heart of dense jungle foliage, to the uncharted depths of the deep blue sea.

Here’s a photograph of my husband’s vision board. As a pilot, Len’s dreams and goals revolve around aircraft: with propellers, without, single wing, bi-wing, tail dragger—you name it! If it flys or glides, he researches it, watches videos about it, and attends the annual EAA AirVenture Fly-In in Oshkosh, Wisconsin.

Len’s vision board — click on the image to enlarge

You’ve heard it said before, “What we think about, we bring about.” That’s the purpose of a vision board—a collection of graphics that help us keep our attention on our intention; graphics that clarify intent and trigger action steps that manifest thoughts into reality.

Did you notice that the right side of the board is empty? I temporarily cleared it of flying paraphernalia to make a point. I call this side Vision Bored. It represents a ho-hum attitude; a mindset that doesn’t carve out time to savor the juicy energy of anticipation.

Are you more of a vision board or vision bored type person?

© TuesdaysWithLaurie.com

 

Salt of the Earth

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Considered “the spice of life” by many in the culinary world, salt has numerous uses both inside and outside the kitchen. Historically its value was so great that in some countries it was even used as currency. Today we refer to exceptionally kind, reliable, or honest people as the “salt of the earth.”

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“Let yourself be open and life will be easier. A spoon of salt in a glass of water makes the water undrinkable. A spoon of salt in a lake is almost unnoticed.”
          — Buddha

  • The glass — a small container we allow to hold our life.
  • The salt — difficulties that mask our joy.

When we allow ourselves to venture beyond self-made boundaries, difficulties don’t disappear, but seem to diminish and take a less active role in our life.

Do you prefer a glass or a lake?

© TuesdaysWithLaurie.com

 

I See You, See Me, See You

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I enjoy taking photographs! Through the lens I’ve observed that when some people see me taking their photo, oftentimes a slight shift occurs—they may stand taller, suck in their tummy, smooth their hair, or tilt their head slightly to their “best” side.

When we see others observing us, sometimes a story starts writing itself in our head about what we think they think. Each person views life through their own experience-based lenses and filters. Sometimes their view lines up with ours. Sometimes it doesn’t.

Stephen Hopson is an inspirational speaker, author, and the world’s first deaf instrument-rated pilot. I admire his perspective: “What other people think of you is none of your business!”

What matters is what you see, what you think, and how you feel.

Are you held hostage by the opinion of others?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.”
— Laurie Buchanan

The Book—Discovering the Seven Selves
The Experience—Life Harmony

© 2013 Laurie Buchanan – All Rights Reserved

Find me on Twitter @HolEssence