During our road trip last week, I made a list of the people, places, things, events, and opportunities in my life that aren’t positive, uplifting, constructive, or healing—that don’t support the best version of me. 

I’m currently in the process of weeding them out of my internal and external landscape—of making room in my personal garden for vibrant new growth. 

[bctt tweet=”How’s your garden coming along?” username=”@TuesWithLaurie”]

How’s your garden coming along?


76 thoughts on “Gardening

  1. I’m in the process of simplifying my life and eradicating the ‘weeds’ that take up too much of my time. But I think that those things that seem like weeds sometimes have a beautiful and beneficial aspect to them. A case, I think, of ‘not throwing out the baby with the bath water.’ Love and blessings, dear Laurie 💙

  2. Great thought. I’m reading a book (The Other Half of Augusta Hope) where people get very upsed at a new neighbour who isn’t into keeping her garden neat and tidy, and they tell her off for allowing the weeds to take over and she tells them: “Your weeds are my flowers”. We are all so different! Thanks, Laurie.

  3. Toxic people, places and things no longer get to be a part of my life. Being retired helps because in the work place there was no way to put them out of my life and the coping was demoralizing.

  4. The roots of some of those “weeds” run deep, irrevocably entwined in the roots of ourselves. They can be pulled again and again, but they will keep creeping back in because they are kin.

  5. You hit a button with me, Laurie. I’ve been talking about this kind of “weeding” with my guy over the past several weeks. Why, oh why, do we all “make” ourselves do things/be with people who are not positive in our lives? I’ve been weeding a bit since spring. One of the biggies in my pile of weeds is “forced socialization.” Just not my cup of tea, and my energy fizzles when I attend these things. So….I’m digging out the roots of those things that aren’t lifting up my energy and my soul.

  6. I have been doing that a lot lately, Laurie! I must say it is amazing how people, places, and things I have culled thus far this year! P.S. It feels invigorating and uplifting! Cher xo

  7. A great thought for Spring! It seems easier to weed (at least for me) as I get older. I’m excited to be focusing my energy on coaching work, memoir writing as well as working toward next steps, family and friends (a select few positive flowers), volunteer engagements. I’m also working on planting new fulfilling and fun ways to grow. I’m retiring from one volunteer engagement after 10 years. It has been rewarding but it’s tme to re-plant myself elsewhere. Major weeding continues on the clearing the clutter. My lenten 40 (clearing, recycling, giving away) was a great success. Onward to the next 40 items+!

  8. Isn’t it therapeutic to weed some people, places and opportunities out of our life? It points toward our spiritual growth. I have forgiven those people and try to look at those places and opportunities as life lessons.

  9. Laurie, I can remember you marveling over the fact that I like to weed my garden, I believe you said “Nobody likes to weed!” I find with the right conditions weeding can be a meditative and mind soothing process with benefits. You are doing useful but gentle work that produces immediate effects, instant gratification laced with pride for having actually done it. And of course. “Work is love made visible” said the Prophet. To the core of the matter, an unweeded garden is losing the beauty and practicality it was designed to bring about. It becomes a wretched place to be, full of briars and tripping vines. Better to keep your garden well tended and spare yourself the deep and bitter uprooting that must come with renovation. Pull your weeds while they are small enough to handle and you’ll find more enjoyment and space in your garden. On the other hand, if you could see my yard right now, you would be rolling on the ground, howling with laughter, that I would have the audacity to comment on weed removal!

  10. Amen to this. Topic close to my heart. In my actual garden I have been pulling and digging up a lot of weeds and planting vegetables, herbs and flowers. Sometimes when I pull weeds I pretend they are the people and organizations who are getting me angry because they are well, taking up my writing and editing time. Result?. I don’t yell at them and my garden gets weeded. I also feel better. However, they still steal my time. I blog about time-stealers from work time in my latest Only Child Writes blog post.

  11. I have been doing a great deal of weeding since my mum died 12 years ago. 2019, I started to try on some new things to see how they would grow. I still hope to find another book group as mine gave up this year. Now the healing group is totally just working on one person and the other 7 folks are just fine with that, but it zaps my energy. One of my criteria is that there must be some benefit for me – preferable joy filled. I miss weeding for as Sandi said there is a kindness and meditation involved but my knees are not useful and my back will not sustain the posture…( I attempt to not back seat drive my partner about what I want completed or planted – it is his garden now) Shot weed and Pig weed I work at a few minutes every time I arrive home, criticism, nastiness, and interruptions are out immediately and throwing pearls ( of wisdom) before swine – long gone.
    Just ate my first bowl of raspberries – now there is a bit of heaven on earth!
    Good luck on your journey….of weeding and sowing

  12. Laurie
    Your plan is such a good idea. For me not so easy to do. Getting rid of stuff is much easier than people. These weeds are usually deeply rooted into my life & memories. So instead of digging them out, I feel just giving more space from them makes it easier to deal with occasionally.

  13. Great metaphor for our gardens and our personal and professional lives. We can’t tell other people how to weed their gardens unless we know how to weed our own.

  14. I like that your piece is entitled “Gardening” and not “Weeding.” Gives the very worthwhile venture a positive spin.
    Something I’ve noticed over the years when I have mindfully “gardened” — those weeds don’t like being plucked out!

  15. Yes, it is necessary not to spend precious time doing those things that are not worthwhile to you; or others, which may not be fun but are necessary to give them a better life. There is satisfaction there.

  16. I’ve recently pulled out a weed ,that for many years I had been told , was poison ivy . I listened , I pulled and now I have a flower garden . Good luck with your weeding Laurie it’s so satisfying.

    • Cherry — I apologize for my delayed response. I just returned from the Soulful Prairies Peaceful Retreat in Illinois. That said…

      Woohoo! I’m in great hopes that in the pulling process it didn’t touch your skin and you suffered a bad reaction.

  17. Laurie, your analogy and this post made me smile. I love how you mentioned ‘weeding them out’. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I need to get more on to this line of thinking 🙂

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