Life | Speaking from the Heart

"Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing." ~ Laurie Buchanan

Archive for the ‘Life’ Category

The Makings of Home Sweet Home

A robin feathering her nest
has very little time to rest
while gathering her bits of twine and twig…

A few weeks ago when the branches were still bare, we saw the makings of an impressive nest in our back yard. Having recently trimmed Willa’s coat, it’s clear that birds find her wiry hair to be prime building material!

It might be a person, a feeling, a specific structure, or a tangible item—what makes a house a home has as many different answers as there are people. Whether you’re:

Gil in South Africa
Kevin in Scotland
Sandi in the southern US
Terrill or Leanne in Canada
Sam near the Big Apple
Ted in New Zealand
Kathy in a her little house in the big woods

What is it to you that makes a house a home?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.”
— Laurie Buchanan

The Book—Discovering the Seven Selves
The Experience—Life Harmony

Find me on Twitter @HolEssence

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Category:

Life, Musings, Nature

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Mirror Mirror on the Wall

Over the past few weeks I’ve had the opportunity for phone-intensive interaction with people—some I know, others I don’t. Regardless, at the end of each conversation I stop and reflect on the exchange of words, tone, and delivery style.

I find myself wondering once again, “What’s it like to be on the receiving end of me?”

When I was in the corporate world, I taught MAGIC—Make A Good Impression on the Client. One of the tips was to keep a mirror on your desk and smile into it when speaking on the phone.

With that in mind, I’ve taken my own advice and placed a mirror on my desk so that I smile on purpose and use words, tone, and a delivery style that I myself would welcome.

What kind of “magic” do you use?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.”
— Laurie Buchanan

The Book—Discovering the Seven Selves
The Experience—Life Harmony

Find me on Twitter @HolEssence

Category:

Life, Personal Growth

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Woody Woodpecker Heralds Spring

I’m out of my cast and into a weight-bearing air-boot—Whoohoo! Although I’m not allowed to drive in it (considered reckless endangerment in the state of Illinois), I now have the mobility to go outside and enjoy spring.

Sitting on the front porch basking in the early morning sunshine, I hear the distinct rat-a-tat-tat of a woodpecker. With still-bare branches, I easily spot the wily redhead as he pecks away with joyful abandon to find his wood-dwelling breakfast.

When I was a kid, Saturday mornings were cartoon-laden with the likes of Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, and my favorite, Woody Woodpecker. Please join me for a
30-second stroll down memory lane.

Rat-a-tat-tat! Rat-a-tat-tat! Spring is the harbinger of new things.

What opportunity is knocking at your door?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.”
— Laurie Buchanan

The Book—Discovering the Seven Selves
The Experience—Life Harmony

Find me on Twitter @HolEssence

Category:

Humor, Life

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When You’ve Got an Itch…

You’ve heard of the seven year itch, jock itch, swimmer’s itch, and even contagious itch.

Due to a slip on the ice, I’m currently sporting a cast on my right leg. When the doctor finished patting down the last of the wet, fiberglass casting tape, he assured me that it would get rock hard, but due to the nature of the break — a spiral fracture — he added, “Don’t walk on it — no weight, whatsoever.”

He additionally cautioned me to not climb trees, ride my bike, swim, or use the cast as a weapon. And went on to say, “If you have an itch, just knock on the cast and the vibration will take care of it.” Liar!

He concluded, “Do not, under any circumstances, use a hanger or other sharp object to scratch an itch.” Easy for you to say!

I’m confident that somewhere in the dusty annuls of history there’s a long forgotten Confucian quote: “When casted leg itch, chopstick come in handy!”

Much to my immense relief, I’ve been enjoying his Zen wisdom.

What are you just itching to get at?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.”
— Laurie Buchanan

The Book—Discovering the Seven Selves
The Experience— Life Harmony

Find me on Twitter @HolEssence

Category:

Health and Wellness, Humor, Life

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The Science of Happiness

Strategically placed among the recessed lighting in our living room ceiling, is an adjustable “fisheye” that rotates so we can highlight the stained glass in our front door. When people drive or walk down our street in the evening, they can’t help but look at it—to focus on it.

“That’s been one of my mantras—focus and simplicity. Simple can be harder than complex. You have to work hard to get your thinking clean to make it simple. But it’s worth it in the end because once you get there, you can move mountains.” — Steve Jobs

In our everyday lives we have multiple opportunities to focus. We can shine our mind’s spotlight on the positive, or on the negative. Like the “fisheye” — it’s an adjustable choice.

Dr. Richard Davidson, a professor of psychology and psychiatry at UW-Madison, scanned the brains of happy people and found they were unusually active in one area—the left prefrontal cortex. Now he and other researchers in the field are learning more about how we can take advantage of our brain’s “plasticity”—its ability to reshape itself—and rewire our own brains to be happier.

“We can always choose to perceive things differently. You can focus on what’s wrong in your life, or you can focus on what’s right.” — Marianne Williamson

Last week I become part of a beta group that’s testing the science of happiness and positive psychology. I just completed part one of the first track. Each day I participate in brief, online “happiness skill builders” specifically designed to promote positive emotional qualities such as gratitude, kindness, mindfulness, and compassion.

Where do you place your focus?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.”
— Laurie Buchanan

The Book—Discovering the Seven Selves
The Experience— Life Harmony

Find me on Twitter @HolEssence

Category:

Health and Wellness, Life, Personal Growth

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Housekeeping — The Kind that Matters

Last week, at her request, I called a potential new client. Questions in hand, I was ready to see if we would mesh in a coaching relationship. Within minutes I discovered that this woman has a short—very short—time to live. The coaching experience I offer is typically nine months in length, so where did I fit in?

Beyond humbling, she shared with me that knowing in advance her approximate date of death has been a tremendous blessing in that she’s completely prepared—except for one thing. Taped to a framed photograph on her nightstand is a clipping from a long-ago magazine article I wrote:

Like the path we walk, giving and receiving forgiveness is a fundamental part of life’s journey. Reminiscent of falling leaves, offenses may scatter the pathway of our heart—the seat of our outlook. This attitude determines the terrain of our path and forgiveness keeps the pathway clear.

It is my perspective that the place to start—the place to launch joy, hope, positive aspirations, and healing begins with forgiveness. Until that bit of housekeeping has been taken care of, everything else is futile.

Since that initial call we’ve had two more conversations. Neither one of us is charging a fee, but you can well imagine that I’m receiving much more than she is. I’m learning how to die.

Do you need to give or receive forgiveness, or are you all set?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.”
— Laurie Buchanan

The Book—Discovering the Seven Selves
The Experience— Life Harmony

Find me on Twitter @HolEssence

Category:

Inspiration, Life, Personal Growth, Spiritual Awareness

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Box Schmox!

Meet the Box
You’re familiar with the term, “Think outside the box.” The box refers to conventional understanding or traditional thinking. In the business world, this might include organizational constraints. Regardless, the box is typically a comfort zone.

Meet its Residents
There’s a tendency for those who think (or live) inside the box to ignore things that don’t fit into its confines. In-the-box thinking (or living) typically stems from a need to control anxiety—trepidation that occurs when something doesn’t fit in the box.

“Instead of thinking outside of the box, get rid of the box.” — Deepak Chopra

Beyond the Box
There’s nothing wrong with conventional wisdom as long as it’s not stale or limiting. But exploration—which requires leaving the box, or at least opening the flaps—leads to the discovery of original thoughts, creative ideas, and innovation.

When was the last time you rendezvoused, flirted, or hung out with inspiration?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.”
— Laurie Buchanan

The Book—Discovering the Seven Selves
The Experience—Life Harmony

Find me on Twitter @HolEssence

Category:

Life, Personal Growth

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What’s the Point?

Last week the weather in our neck of the woods dipped well below zero, and much like strutting peacocks who flaunt their dazzling feathers, the homes in our neighborhood boasted glistening icicles; the perfect visual for this week’s post, “What’s the point?”

As a transformational life coach, this—by far—is the question I get asked the most.

“The purpose of life is life of purpose.” — Robert Byrne

I’ll be the first to say that I’m not the be all, end all. That said…

I believe that each of us has an individual and specific reason for being here. Being conscious of that reason provides us with the most basic and concrete thing we can know about ourself.

Many people believe that we find our purpose. I don’t.
It’s my perspective that we determine it.

By intent, I determined to be a mindful agent of heart-based change — body, mind, and spirit.

Have you determined your purpose?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.”
— Laurie Buchanan

Discovering the Seven Selves Life Harmony

Category:

Inspiration, Life, Spiritual Awareness

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Buddhism and Smartphones

I appreciate modern technology; it’s conducive to what I do for a living, enabling me to meet with clients all over the globe via phone, FaceTime, and Skype.

My smartphone allows me to do several things at once if I want. I don’t.

I love that it’s intelligent enough to also accommodate the Buddhist philosophy of doing one thing at a time: talk on the phone, take a photograph or video, make a recording, send a text, listen to music, transfer money to/from my bank, check in at the airport, even read a book or watch a movie.

I appreciate the vivid artwork on my smartphone’s protective cover — it makes me smile every time I see it.

I also appreciate the Zen Temple Bell ringtone that Len purchased for me. It doesn’t startle. Rather, it’s a single, soft, low tone — a gentle reminder to ask myself, “What’s it like to be on the receiving end of me?” before I pick up.

I’m not a Zen monk, but I enjoy being present in everything I do. Thich Nhat Hanh, one of my favorite Zen monks said, “Smile, breathe, and go slowly.” Like single-tasking, that works well with my lifestyle.

“When walking, walk. When eating, eat.” — Zen proverb

By the way, the sassy digital assistant associated with my smartphone recently suggested that I change the spelling of my name from Laurie to Lori, informing me that the latter version is much more popular! No thanks, I’m good.

Do you find that modern technology improves or hinders your lifestyle?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.”
— Laurie Buchanan

Discovering the Seven Selves Life Harmony

Category:

Buddhism, Life, Spiritual Awareness, Technology

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Rod Stewart and Déjà Vu

A couple of weeks ago I drove an hour and a half north to Janesville, Wisconsin. I didn’t go alone, I took my road companion of many years — Rod Stewart.

We jammed along Route 14, passing farmhouses on both sides of the frozen trek as the sun pierced the early morning sky. Crossing the border he asked, Do you think I’m sexy? Well, of course I do!

Arriving early for my appointment, I was shown to a waiting area. The ambience had a distinctly cool, futuristic feel to it that triggered an immediate sense of Déjà Vu — the sensation that what’s currently happening has been experienced in the past.

This, however, was like Colette Baron Reid’s book, Remembering the Future. This experience hadn’t happened in the past, it happened in the future, yet I was remembering it…

This is an untouched photo, straight from my iPhone. Eerie, isn’t it?

Mouth dry, heart accelerating, my now-clammy hands eased earbuds in as Rod’s stony-throated voice assured, I’ll stand by you, won’t let nobody hurt you, I’ll stand by you. I hit the “repeat album” button just before I was asked to remain perfectly still and a contrast agent was injected into a vein in my left arm.

As Rod and I drove home together we both wondered out loud, Have you ever seen the rain coming down on a sunny day? And came to the conclusion that, An old raincoat won’t ever let you down.

What was your last sense of Déjà Vu?

Laurie Buchanan

“Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing.”
— Laurie Buchanan

Discovering the Seven Selves Life Harmony

Category:

Life, Metaphysical, Musings

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Speaking from the Heart

"Whatever you are not changing, you are choosing." ~ Laurie Buchanan

Archive for the ‘Life’ Category

The Makings of Home Sweet Home

Mirror Mirror on the Wall

Woody Woodpecker Heralds Spring

When You’ve Got an Itch…

The Science of Happiness

Housekeeping — The Kind that Matters

Box Schmox!

What’s the Point?

Buddhism and Smartphones

Rod Stewart and Déjà Vu

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